“Remember that time we made the six-hour drive to Sunday River ski hill and it took twelve hours to drive back in that huge snow storm?”
I was recalling
this recently with a friend with whom I shared this unexpected and unwelcome experience after a two-day ski trip in Maine. On return, as we crossed the Canada-U.S.
border in St. Stephen, the border officer looked at us as if we were daft to
be on the roads during the blizzard. It was daft, but there are few
opportunities to stop between Bangor, Maine and Saint John, New Brunswick.
Especially in early winter, when many seasonal properties are closed. Once one
starts on the journey, one is committed.
This remains
a memorable experience for me and my friend Paul. Shared experiences like these
create bonds, break down barriers, and can provide laughs for years.
Further
below I’ve provided a gift article about a school crossing guard who builds experiences
and community connections.
Creating
Shared Experiences
My sister Janet
maintains a blog titled Carefull Connections (https://carefullconnections.blogspot.com/) focused on supporting people,
especially family, with memory and cognitive issues. The lessons apply much more broadly. In the
post linked below she writes about creating shared experiences, and how we
often later joyfully recall these. Drop her a message at the blog if you find
the content useful.
Any of us
can remember often silly, but often significant, events that happened with a
friend or family member. We’ll usually
start sharing those stories with “remember that time …” It’s difficult to encounter such experiences
in an online environment.
https://carefullconnections.blogspot.com/2023/01/connecting-in-visit.html
Building
Community and the Role of Social Media
Is social
media effective in enabling us to form community? I believe it is somewhat
effective and helpful, but not a substitute for face-to-face communication, and
not for conducting difficult conversations.
The article
below professes that “social media is the refined sugar of social interaction.”
That’s about right, isn’t it? And too
much refined sugar is unhealthy for humans.
Face-to-face
communication requires skills that are difficult, and likely impossible, to
refine online. Online communication is
convenient, but not a substitute for face-to-face, which is more complex and
nuanced, and requires a listener to process tone, vocal quality, facial
expressions and body posture.
Perhaps these
days people lack confidence in their ability to manage face-to-face social
interaction.
Maybe Seriously
Unhealthy?
In a similar
manner, too much online communication can be unhealthy for humans. Studies are available that document Internet
Communication Disorder (ICD). The
passage below is from the abstract of a 2016 academic article
https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2016-59883-001
“Online communication applications such as Facebook,
WhatsApp, and Twitter are some of the most frequently used Internet
applications. There is a growing amount of individuals suffering diminished
control over their use of online communication applications which leads to
diverse negative consequences in offline life. This could be referred to as
Internet-communication disorder (ICD)”
A
Crossing Guard Who Builds Community Connections
Please enjoy
my gift article from The Toronto Globe and Mail about a crossing guard who turns
a cold intersection into a place of warm connection.
